I like Kaufman (See Adaptation, then read this)

30 08 2004

I’m old. I’m fat. I’m bald. *
(reaches for notebook, catches
sight of bare feet)
My toenails have turned strange. I am *
old. I am — *
(flips through notebook, paces)
I have nothing. She’ll think I’m an *
idiot. Why couldn’t I stay on that diet? *
She’ll pretend not to be disappointed,
but I’ll see that look, that look — *
(passes mirror, glances quickly
at reflection, looks away)
God, I’m repulsive.
(another glance) *
But as repulsive as I think? My Body *
Dysmorphic Disorder confuses everything.
I mean, I know people call me Fatty *
behind my back. Or Fatso. Or,
facetiously, Slim. But I also realize *
this is my own perverted form of selfaggrandizement,
that no one talks about
me at all. What possible interest is an
old, bald, fat man to anyone?

Think about it.

FAQ on the movie.

This. Anyone who reads this normally, read this and dwell on it please. Comment as you will.

They’re going to find us.
I don’t think so.
I don’t want to die, Donald. I’ve wasted
my life. God, I’ve wasted it.
You did not. And you’re not gonna die.
I wasted it. I admire you, Donald,
y’know? I spend my whole life paralyzed
worrying what people think of me and you –
– you’re just oblivious.
I’m not oblivious.
No, you don’t understand. I say that as
a compliment. I really do.
There was this time in high school. I
was watching you out the library window.
You were talking to Sarah Marsh.
Oh, God. I was so in love with her.
I know. And you were flirting with her.
And she was really sweet to you.
I remember that.
Then when you walked away, she started
making fun of you with Kim Canetti. It
was like they were laughing at me. You
didn’t know at all. You seemed so happy.
I knew. I heard them.
How come you looked so happy?
I loved Sarah, Charles. It was mine,
that love. I owned it. Even Sarah
didn’t have the right to take it away. I
can love whoever I want.
She thought you were pathetic.
That was her business, not mine. You are
what you love, not what loves you.
That’s what I decided a long time ago.


28 08 2004



27 08 2004

Ah yes, I’m in Kill Bill mode now.

So, here I am on the eve of the first true party weekend of the new school year. Half the frosh are in now, and half will be here by tomorrow night, plus there’s no school until Thursday. Can you say “Pah-tay”?

This is also the beginning of the second half of my school career… technically. I’ll probably go at least a semester over, and I also might do grad school, so I won’t get too teary-eyed yet. Wah…

Life is good. I just gorged myself on Papa John’s for a Hoofer’s Sailing Club Friday night social. Mmmmm… someone join the club with me! I’m learning two new boats now that I’m heavy rated on Techs. The new ones are the 420, a two-person racing boat, and the Badger Sloop, a slightly larger boat made to carry up to five people. I’m thinking once I get this, we’ll all head out and have a few beers while we’re on the water. Yay. Notify me if interested.

I still have some “deep” writings to do, and the thoughts mount up daily, so soon it shall pass… perhaps after I find a fucking desk.

“Deskless and not currently in” Love,

Icky, Sticky: green matter of recreational value

27 08 2004

Mmmmm… having a nice Berghoff Dark Ale and watching Kill Bill Vol. 1. What better? I have to pause for the fight scenes… drool… so good.

So life has been good but still busy as hell. I haven’t been to Tae Kwon Do. I debated going today, but I had other things to do as the case has been lately.

Aw man. Three beers and tired to boot. Deep thoughts tomorrow?

I thought of things I’d like to do before thirty:
1. Learn French
2. Learn Japanese
3. Climb a mountain
4. Become a black belt
5. Learn a weapon
More to come!

I am Co…

26 08 2004

A quick entry while I wait for laundry to finish. No desk for the computer, but I’ll try to finish another entry later.

Anyone know anyone named Dana? She heeded advice from me, which is kind of funny. Anywho, I have some major debriefing to do soon, so keep looking.


Ill Will

22 08 2004

Hah… what is my subject?

I had so many important things to write. Now I am “le tired”. Until then, check out this amazing art.

Iota dos

18 08 2004

Just read this in the latest Onion. Thought I’d share:

State Bird Reconsidered After Latest Wren Attack

COLUMBIA, SC—Gov. Mark Sanford spoke out Monday in favor of changing his state’s bird from the Carolina wren to “anything else” following the ninth unprovoked wren attack this year. “In light of last week’s events, I strongly feel the wren is no longer a good representative for the state of South Carolina,” Sanford said, referring to Friday’s tragic dive-bombing and pecking incident at a Myrtle Beach preschool. “Maybe it’s time we recognize one of our more docile birds, like the robin or the magnolia warbler.” Sanford advised anyone hearing the wren’s cries of “tea-kettle, tea-kettle” to run for cover immediately.


18 08 2004

Eek… it’s raining and wet (not the good kind.) Unpacking’s a pain but lazy, and I’ve been sailing a bit but not today… the lake’s closed. When did Hoofers decide they had the power to close a lake? Oh well. Hopefully when “I leave the library, the rain will be better for my walk home.

I know I’m falling WAY behind on the book… man. Real soon I’ll have it.

Till then, pray for the return of the internet!



13 08 2004

States I’ve been to:

create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

Jamboree of moving delight

10 08 2004

Ugh. Cable was out last week. That’s ok. I don’t watch cable much. The internet is now out, and I won’t have it back regularly until the 24th! My life is ruined! Well… no, it’s not; but I’ll be tougher to get a hold of, so anyone who reads this regularly who wishes to talk to me should call. You know the bling. If you don’t, I’m not posting it here. 😀

I got my heavy wind rating for Techs yesterday, so now I can start hitting up larger boats. When I get the Badger sloop down, I’ll take any four people who want to out for sailing and maybe beer?

Moving is quickly becoming a hell. Lots of boxes to pack up and a huge storage space for all my vital things. I finally got my futon put away and have a place to live during the Movin’ Blues weekend, but there’s still so much to organize, and I still have to pay my first month’s rent. Blech!

Last night we dug up a yellowjacket nest. That was pretty crazy, especially seeing the queen, which is about 3X bigger than a normal yellowjacket. I may be working in a yellowjacket lab through the end of September… drool…

Well, I’m at work, and I’ve justified all I need to superficially. Diggin deep into my psyche doesn’t work so hot at work; but I do have some social rants, so stay tuned.